One day while sitting in Harold’s porch his dog Tequila walked by. Seeing the dog Harold recalled a moment, then glanced at Dr. Wetbrain and spoke.
“I was drinking with this hillbilly on his farm one day and he had a huge mangy dog. This dog has his own beer bowl! This hillbilly would pour two cans of beer into this bowl and the dog would sloppily lap up most of the beer, looked at us then staggered away. Weird!”
The Doctor sat up, put down his beer and said, “That’s not weird! All sorts of wild animals like to get drunk also. Let me tell you about some of these drunk wild animals.”
In Madden, Alberta there are the Bohemian Waxwing birds who in the fall consume as much fermented Mountain Ash berries as possible before the winter weather comes in and the berries are gone. These drunk birds were stumbling around and flying into things like windows and power poles. So, in Madden the Alberta Institute for Wildlife Center collects these drunk, passed out birds, then they are put into a hamster cage till they sober up. Then these waxwing birds are released the next day into the wild. A bird drunk tank.
In Sweden, Per Johansson found a female moose stuck and kicking around in his apple tree. Now that I think of it, I have had a few dates that did the same thing. The assumption is that this poor moose was likely drunk from the fermented apples lying all over the ground.
Be careful on the beach with your drinks on the Caribbean Island of St. Kitts for the Vervet monkeys will steal them. These little monkeys will sneak up to you and when you are not watching will snatch your drink. Then, they run away and when it is safe will happily guzzle your Strawberry Daiquiri down. Studies have shown that most of these, booze stealing Vervet monkeys drink in moderation, but around 12% of them are heavy drinkers. Nothing worse then, a drunken monkey.
Giggling Dr. Wetbrain looks at Harold and blurted out, “You know Harold when you drink whiskey you also become a drunk wild animal.”